Let’s think about these two questions. Are you in control of your emotions? Or, do you let others control your emotions?
I cannot tell you the number of times that I have heard “I don’t want to hurt his/her feelings.” Or “He/she hurt my feelings.” If you seriously think about these last two statements, the only way for you to hurt someone’s feelings is if they give you permission. The only way you can have your feelings hurt is if you give someone else permission to do so. This is a very difficult concept for most of us to learn. In general, we don’t want to be responsible for what we feel. It is always easier to say it is someone else’s fault if our feelings are hurt. On the other hand, we somehow feel we have unlimited control of other people’s feelings. In reality…we don’t. We have no more control over someone else’s feelings than they have over ours.
The key to remember is that you, and you alone, are in control of your feelings. When you take responsibility for what you feel, you will be amazed at how good you can feel most of the time. I’m not saying that you won’t feel hurt from time to time. We all do. But, the feeling will not last long when you understand that YOU are in control…not any outside influences.