Have you ever had a peaceful, easy feeling? The one where you’re just comfortable with life? It doesn’t mean that you don’t have problems, wants, or needs.
It means that you’re just comfortable and can go with whatever direction life points you. Tough decisions just seem to be easier to make and you move on. You don’t stress out by overthinking every part of your life.
A couple of weeks ago I was talking with friends and they asked about my love life. I shared a couple of tidbits but, in essence, not much was happening.
I told them that I was in a good emotional place. My focus is on the present, not the past or the future.
Maybe it’s because I have enough things to keep me busy that I don’t focus on what I don’t have. I’m just thankful for all that I do have in my life including some great friends.
One of those friends politely nudged me and reminded me that I needed to take a more active roll in finding the right one. And…I agreed, especially since that is exactly what I tell you to do.
It’s a matter of priorities.
I was at a social event recently and a gentleman asked where dating ranked in my priorities. I thought for a minute and answered, God, work and business needs, family, my boat, and then dating.
As I look at my list of priorities, I’m comfortable with them as they are right now. Even though I know I really would like to have someone in my life, there are other things that demand my attention.
I also recognize that this is just a season in my life. There will be a time in the near future that business travel and boating won’t take as much of my time and attention and dating will move up in priority.
There are seasons for everything.
Just like farming there are seasons for everything in life and the same holds true for dating.
In the spring you plant.
This is the time you start preparing fields and planting seeds. You should take time to prepare yourself, get emotionally healthy, get physically healthy, and get intellectually healthy.
Take time to get moving again by being physically active and feed your mind with good stuff.
Create or refine your online dating profile and start getting out and being social. This is planting the seeds for future dates and potential relationships.
In the summer you nurture your crop.
This is the time to water, to ward of pests, and to monitor growth. You start to look at the people you have dated and your potential suitors.
You nurture new friendships and potential relationships. Then you weed out the people that are toxic to you. It’s also time to review your progress. What’s working for you and what isn’t.
Keep doing the things that are working and change up the things that aren’t
Harvest in the fall.
It’s time to harvest the crops in the field. This is when you look at any relationships you’ve started to develop. Do they have potential for a long-term commitment or are they just a flash in the pan?
Go with the ones that have potential and let go of any that don’t.
Rest in the winter
After harvesting, the field needs to rest. If you found the love of your life, this is the time to enjoy your present and future.
If you’re still looking, you may need to take a break from dating. It’s easy to get frustrated with poor dating results.
This is your time to heal from past relationships, keep moving by being physically active, and feed your mind with good stuff.
Doing these things will set you up for a much better attitude when you are getting back into dating. This is the time to find that peaceful easy feeling that allows you to be happier, more relaxed, and more confident you your decisions.
I hope I’ve given you some food for thought to help you work through the different seasons of dating and finding your peaceful easy feeling.
Please feel free share your thoughts, your successes, and your missteps to help others get better one step at a time. Leave a comment below or drop me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.