Blogs

#134 - The age of disposable relationships!

It started with the TV dinner, then disposable paper plates and cups, disposable diapers, disposable razors, disposable film cameras, and the list goes on and on. Technology has had an amazing impact on our lives in the last 60 years. However, not all technology has had a positive impact.
 
We have come to live in an immediate gratification society. With the introduction of such amazing technology as computers, the internet, smart phones, and the unlimited apps and websites that are available, it’s easy to search for virtually anything you want. In fact, you can just toss aside a relationship and go on-line to find someone else. With the creation of apps like Tinder, OK Cupid, and several others, searching for a new relationship has been degraded even further when you start to base your decisions upon looks and the possibility of a one night stand.
 
No-fault divorce has made it easier to leave a marriage. Required separation is almost non-existent. The requirement to show cause for a divorce such as adultery, physical abuse, substance abuse, etc. is no longer necessary. These are just some of the contributing factors related to high divorce rates.
 
It has become too easy to not fight for a relationship. Because of the things I mentioned above and several other factors, it has become too easy to just walk away when things get tough.
 
Am I saying that you shouldn’t walk away from any relationship when things get tough? Absolutely not. There are relationships that are toxic. There are relationships that may be great, but something is missing such as chemistry or certain characteristics you desire. It is okay to walk away in these cases. However, to walk away when a relationship gets rocky because life has thrown you a curve ball is wrong. Be mature enough to distinguish between real reasons to walk away and being too lazy or self-centered to work on and build your extraordinary relationship.
 
When I started to write this article, I was focused on the ease of just walking away from relationships and marriages. I quickly realized that there is a fine line between walking away from the wrong relationship and walking away because your relationship became a challenge. Are you committed to finding a long-term relationship or are you committed to taking the easy way out and moving on to someone new when things get rough? Are you realistic in your relationship expectations or are you living with a fantasy that life with the right person is all sunshine and butterflies?
 
It all comes down to emotional maturity. Your emotional maturity (or immaturity) will shine through when things get rough. If you are quick to discard a relationship then you may want to check your level of emotional maturity. If you hang on to the bitter end in hopes that something magical will happen, you might want to check your level of emotional maturity.
 

Learn when to fight for a healthy relationship and learn when to let go. If you don’t know what a healthy relationship should look like, find a dating coach, counselor or therapist to help you.