#336 - What the opposite sex thinks about your online dating profile

Every Tuesday on my Facebook page I post a question generally about dating. The questions vary from how to break up to best date night ideas.

Last week I asked the question “What is your biggest pet peeve on other people’s online dating profiles?”

This was a very popular question and it was shared a couple of times on Facebook. This was great because it gave me the opportunity to see what people that don’t normally follow me had to say.

Here’s what the ladies had to say about men’s profiles.

• “Why would someone use an avatar?!”
• “No photo and profile is too long!”
• “Listing all the things you don’t want in a partner instead of listing all of the things you bring to the table”
• “Not taking the time to write their own profile, and just copying a recommended suggestion!!!”
• “20-year-old pictures”
• “Hats and sunglasses and no smiles make them look mean. Guys get the smiles on, remove the hat and glasses”
• “Shirtless. Ugh.”
• “Posting pictures of their motorcycle and their cars. Also, no woman anywhere cares about your fish. We’re not looking for Hunter Gatherers anymore.”

Ladies, here is what the men had to say.

• “Too many people in the photos. I am looking at the profile for that lady. Need multiple pictures of her in different settings that describe her.”
• “Stop posting pics with masks and why do women post pics of their kids on a dating profile? Also I will instantly swipe left if you’re smoking and flipping off the camera. That’s so unattractive. Stop with the filters, nope if only face shots, and post new adapted photos.”
• “Pictures with 3 or 4 people in every photo so you don’t know what the other person looks like”
• “The lies or veiled reality of who they are and what they actual look like.”
• “Match them then they ghost you!!! Hmmm”
• “Pictures from 1980”

While this is by no means a scientific study of online dating profiles, it is almost exactly what I hear every day.

The interesting thing is that men and women complain about almost the exact same things. Sunglasses, hats, no smiles, too many people in the picture, photos with kids, grandkids, or pets are all turn-offs to the opposite sex.

Probably the worst offenders are the ones that post memes, pictures of places you’ve been, and ladies…a picture of your legs from the knees down looking out at the sea.

We’ve all been to great places. We’re all proud of our children and grandchildren. And we’re all proud of the things we’ve accumulated or accomplished.

These are great things to share as you’re getting to know someone. They don’t make a great first impression on a dating site.

Research shows that it takes as little as 1/10^th of a second to form a first impression online. That means you need to create a great profile to stand out.

Studies also show that profiles with 4+ pictures perform better than those with fewer pictures. Smiling gets you noticed more.

This is a great opportunity for you to review your own online profile to see if you’re making any of the mistakes listed above.

If you’re going to seriously look for a lifetime partner online, wouldn’t it make sense to create the best resume’ you can?

Yes, I said resume’. When you think about it in practical terms, you are applying for a lifetime position with someone and they are doing the same.

I’m not suggesting you do anything other than be honest and portray yourself as realistically as possible.

It may seem like a daunting task at first because no one is really comfortable talking about themselves. But, it has to be done if you want online dating to work for you.

If you don’t talk about yourself, how will anyone ever determine if you’re a potential match for them.

If you’re serious about finding your soul mate, invest some time in creating a great online presence. It will make a difference in your overall online dating experience.

If you get frustrated with dating, can’t pick a good date to save your life, or just struggle figuring out what you want in your next relationship, check out my book, Dating Backward: A practical guide to dating and finding your soul mate.

Until next week, have a great and blessed day.