#380 - The Heartbreaking Reality of Choosing Pets Over Human Relationships
One of the saddest days of my life was the day I had to put my dog down. We had her for about 16 years and she was truly a part of the family. Having a dog is like having a perpetual 2-year-old child.
Each pet, whether it’s a dog or cat, has its own personality and they just work their way into your heart. They’re always happy to see you no matter how long you’ve been gone or what kind of mood you’re in.
They sense when you’re sad or hurting. They don’t care whether you have a big house, a fancy car, are rich or poor. They just give you unconditional love and try to please you and comfort you. All they ask is for the same in return. Love them back, feed them, and give them a safe place to sleep and all is well in their world.
What’s not to love about them, right? There’s going for walks when you don’t want to, or just getting up to let them out and back in again. And then turn around and have to let them out and back in again.
It’s also about making sure they’re healthy and stay that way. It’s about not leaving them alone for too long. It’s about dealing with separation anxiety, both for you and for them. LOL It’s about training them to be polite around people and other animals.
When you think about it, owning a pet is not unlike a human relationship. Both types of relationships require commitment and effort. The primary difference is that your dog will give you unconditional love whereas your human partner likely won’t.
As a dating coach I’m noticing a growing trend to abandon dating in preference to getting a dog or cat. It seems that people would much rather not have to deal with human relationship issues and not have to put in the effort to make a human relationship work long-term.
After all, your pets have limited communication ability. They’re not going to argue with you about what’s for dinner, dealing with your bad mood, or when you can and can’t have sex.
It’s almost a narcissistic relationship in the sense it’s all about you. You don’t have to worry about what your dog thinks as long as they get fed (and that’s just a matter dumping some food in their bowl), let them out to poop, and occasionally snuggle up with them.
They do basically whatever it is YOU want. There’s no discussion. There’s no giving in to someone else’s wants, needs, and desires. What could be better than that?
Personally, I think that becomes a very lonely existence, and I do mean existence. Yes, pets are nice but it’s not the same as having someone there to have a conversation with. There’s no sharing of how the day went. There’s no celebrating the day’s victories or comforting each other in the time of loss.
There’s no one there to bounce ideas off of, no physical or emotional intimacy, and no human connection. Yes, I’m sure most of you that have settled into pet life are saying that life is just so much simpler this way.
I agree. It is sooo much simpler. It’s just not as rewarding or fulfilling long-term. Pets have a limited life span. They won’t be there in your time of need. You can’t call and ask them to pack a bag and say we’re heading out for the weekend.
Vacations are more difficult. You generally have to find someone to care for your dog or board them for a week or two while you’re gone. PLUS…you can’t enjoy your vacation with your “best friend” because they can’t travel with you.
There is something special about your pets. But, I’ll argue that they just can’t replace the human connection of an extraordinary relationship even with all its messy parts. And in the end even with a pet, you still end up alone and lonely.
If dating has become a chore or an unpleasant experience, it might be because of unhealed wounds from the past. If deep down inside, you’d still like to find the love of your life, let’s talk. Follow this link to schedule a 30-minute Discovery Call to see if personal coaching might be a good fit for you. Click Here
Happy Dating.