#400 - Aswering Your Questions!
This past week, I received a thought-provoking question from someone on Facebook. I wanted to share it with you because it touches on a common struggle in the dating world—the fear that there’s always someone better out there.
William asked:
“Will you always feel like there's someone better out there? No one is perfect and 100%—I’m sure not—but I strive to improve myself every day to show up as a better version of myself, someone I would want to be with. With so many choices, you may think there's someone better for you. And if that’s the case, could you still be searching years or even decades from now?”
Here’s my response:
“Great question, William! I believe we all have more than one soul mate—it’s just a matter of which one you find first. When you meet the right person, the search stops. You won’t be wondering if there’s someone better because you’ll experience a level of contentment and connection you’ve never felt before. And she’ll feel the same way about you. That doesn’t mean you won’t have challenges, but the difference is that you’ll both be committed to resolving them as a team. Until then, keep striving to be the best version of yourself every day. That’s the key to attracting the right person into your life. Have a great weekend!”
This question really resonated with me because it highlights how many people misunderstand the dating process. A lot of singles believe the problem is a lack of good dating options. But often, the real issue is that they’re looking for multiple “good” people to choose from rather than focusing on finding the one who is truly right for them.
Many people approach dating like it’s still as easy and organic as it was in their teens or twenties. But the reality is, dating changes as we grow older, and we need to adjust our approach accordingly. Here are a few key shifts to recognize:
- Life experience has changed us. We have decades of personal and relationship experiences that shape what we want—and don’t want—in a partner. This makes us more selective, which is a good thing, but it also means we need to be clear on our priorities.
- The dating landscape has evolved. The way people meet and connect today is completely different than it was 30 years ago. Online dating, social media, and different lifestyle habits all play a role in shaping modern relationships.
- Our social circles have shifted. Unlike in our younger years, when most of our peers were single, many of the people we know today are married, divorced, or in long-term relationships. This means we have fewer natural opportunities to meet new singles in our day-to-day lives.
- Our approach to socializing has changed. Going out to clubs and big social events has likely been replaced by small gatherings with close friends, quiet dinners, or more routine activities. While these are enjoyable, they don’t always create opportunities to meet new people.
None of these shifts are bad, but they do require us to be more intentional about dating. The key is to date with clarity and purpose—not just to fill the void of being single, but to truly seek a meaningful and fulfilling connection.
If you’re feeling stuck in your dating life or unsure about how to navigate these changes, let’s chat. I offer a free 30-minute Discovery Call where we can explore what’s working, what’s not, and how you can start dating with greater success and confidence. Click here to schedule your call now.