#408 - Whatever Happened to Planning a Date?
Dating in today’s world has changed drastically from what it used to be. The convenience of texting and social media has made it easier than ever to reach out to someone, but has it also made us lazy when it comes to making plans? Whatever happened to the simple courtesy of planning a date ahead of time?
Now, I’m not saying that every date needs to be some grand, extravagant event that requires weeks of preparation. I’m talking about the basic decency of calling or texting in advance to check if someone is available and interested. You know, giving the other person the respect of some notice instead of expecting them to drop everything at a moment’s notice.
For years, I’ve heard women complain about men making last-minute plans, expecting them to be available on a whim. And yet, I’ve noticed something lately—women are doing the same thing! It seems like last-minute dating is becoming a norm for both men and women. But why? Have we all become so accustomed to instant gratification that we no longer consider how our actions affect others?
In the past few weeks alone, I’ve had at least four or five last-minute invitations to meet for the first time with less than 12 hours’ notice. In a couple of cases, it was even less than three hours. While I appreciate the thought of meeting someone new, these last-minute invitations send a message—intentional or not—that my time isn’t valued.
I get it, life is busy, and sometimes, plans change. But here’s the thing—many people still have schedules to maintain, whether it’s work, family responsibilities, or personal commitments. Not everyone is retired or has the flexibility to change plans at the drop of a hat. Even if someone has nothing planned, they might not want to rearrange their entire day just to accommodate a last-minute date.
So, what does this say about modern dating?
It suggests that many of us have fallen into a pattern of casual, low-effort connections. We’re living in a time where people swipe, match, and message without putting much thought into building something meaningful. Instead of planning and looking forward to a date, people are treating it as an afterthought—an activity to squeeze in if nothing better comes along.
And let’s be honest—no one wants to feel like an afterthought.
If you truly want to make a connection with someone, take the time to show that you respect them and their time. If you’re interested in meeting someone, plan ahead. It doesn’t have to be complicated. A simple text or call a few days in advance asking, “Would you like to grab coffee on Saturday afternoon?” goes a long way in showing that you are intentional and considerate.
The reality is that dating is challenging enough without adding the frustration of last-minute plans. So, let’s bring back the courtesy of planning. Let’s be mindful of each other’s time and put in the effort to create meaningful connections. Because at the end of the day, if you’re serious about finding a great relationship, it starts with showing a little respect—and that includes making plans ahead of time.